FEEL THE RAIN

Out of Tune

As I was cleaning under my bed, I came across a guitar case covered in dust. Believe is or not, I had completely forgotten than I owned a guitar. I hadn't seen it since the first week of school when I had shoved it underneath my bed. But there it was. I pulled the case out and dusted it off, revealing the splatter-painted cover. Unlatching it, I lifted the top.

My guitar had been sitting in its case for so long that one of the strings had snapped and the rest were out of tune. I replaced the string, tuned the guitar, and started playing. The strings dug into my fingers as my hands settled into the chords. If felt so weird to play, but it also felt familiar and welcoming. I had forgotten how much I loved playing my guitar.

I set the guitar off to the side and dug through all of the papers in my case, looking for the perfect song to play. Among tabs of country songs and hymns, I found a song that I didn't even know I had. Picking up my guitar again, I strummed through the opening chords, and started into the song.


I searched for love
When the night came and it closed in
I was alone
but You found me where I was hiding
and now I'll never ever be the same
It was the sweetest voice that called my name
singing

You're not alone
For I am here
let me wipe away your every fear
My love I've never left your side
I have seen you through the darkest nights
and I'm the one who's loved you all your life
All of your life

You cry yourself to sleep
cause the hurt is real
and the pain cuts deep
All hope seems lost
With heartache your closest friend
and everyone else long gone
You've had to face the music on your own
but there is a sweeter song that calls you home


You're not alone
For I am here
Let me wipe away your every tear
My love I've never left your side
I have seen you through the darkest nights
And I'm the one who's loved you all your life
All your life

This week has been really rough. There have been a lot of changes in my life, and to be perfectly honest with you, I really hate change. This song seemed to be God speaking to me. All year, I had put my trust in friends and earthly things, and this week had fallen on my face for what seemed like the millionth time. My heart was battered and broken. None of my friends could heal me, but they pointed me to God.

For a while, I refused to listen. I didn't want to forgive and leave everything in God's hands. I was blinded by hurt. I scrambled from friend to friend, looking for someone who could relate to my pain and tell me what to do.

Heart-broken and worn out, I desperately threw myself down at the foot of the cross. I had tried everything and everyone but God. Now, as I poured out my heart to Him, the only one who could relate to my sorrow, He told me to forgive and move forward, trusting in Him.

When I chose to give everything over to Him, my week didn't magically become better. But every time I start to struggle, I pray for the strength to keep moving forward, to forgive and forget what has happened in the past.

Are you out of tune with God? Whatever your burden, I plead with you lay it down at the foot of the cross. God wants you to be happy. All you have to do is rest in Him.

See

Right now all I can taste are bitter tears 

And right now all I can see are clouds of sorrow 

But from the other side of all this pain

Is that You I hear, laughing loud and calling out to me? 

Saying "See it's everything you said that it would be, 

And even better than you would believe. 

And I'm counting down the days until you're here with me, 

And finally, you'll see." 

But right now, all I can say is "Lord, how long 

Before you come and take away this aching?" 

This night of weeping seems to have no end. 

But when the morning light breaks through, 

We'll open up our eyes and we will see 

It's everything that He said that it would be 

And even better than we would believe 

And he's counting down the days 'til 

He says "Come with me." 

And finally He'll wipe every tear from our eyes 

And make everything new, just like He promised 

Wait and see, just wait and see, wait and see
And I'm counting down the days until I see 

It's everything He said that it would be 

And even better than we would believe 

And I'm counting down the days 'til 

He says, "Come with me." 

And finally, we'll see. We will see. 

Oh taste and see that the Lord is good, the Lord is good 

The Lord is good. Oh taste and see that the Lord is good

The Lord is good.

~"See" by Steven Curtis Chapman

He Touched Me

In Bible times, lepers were the outcasts of society. And when I say outcast, I don't mean that they were slightly unpopular. What I mean is that they literally could not associate with society. They were unclean. To touch a leper was to make yourself unclean, to become like them.

"When he (Jesus) was come down from the mountain, great multitudes followed him. And behold, there came a leper and worshipped him, saying, Lord if thou wilt, thou canst make me clean." (Matthew 8:1, 2 KJV)

In this chapter, Jesus meets a leper who has come to him in desperation. The leper hears of this amazing man who heals people of their illnesses and infirmities. But he's a leper, and he doubts that Jesus will want to heal a leper. At the same time, though, he realizes that Jesus may be his last hope. Throwing all caution to the wind, this man does the unthinkable. Throwing himself before Jesus, he begs for healing, not even fully believing that he is worthy of it.

"And Jesus put forth his hand, and touched him, saying, I will; be thou clean. And immediately his leprosy was cleansed." (Matthew 8:3)

We don't know how long this man had been a leper, but we know that it was long enough to thoroughly break his spirits. He thought so little of himself that he wasn't even sure the Son of God would want to heal him. And yet, Jesus healed him. He had compassion on a weary and worn out soul. But there is another important point in here that a lot of people miss. 

Jesus touched the leper.

He didn't have to. He had healed people before without touching them. But Jesus knew that this man needed more than just physical healing. In that touch, Jesus healed the leper's heart.

This man had been disowned by his family, closest friends, and all of society in general. He felt worthless. His life was meaningless. That simple touch from Jesus was reassurance that someone cared. And not just any someone. God cared.

What have you done this week to ease someone's suffering? Not just helping someone with physical labor or helping with homework. What have you done to point someone to Christ? To heal their heart?

My Best Friend

Today began like it usually did. BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! I hit the snooze button and rolled over. Again and again my alarm rang, but I would hit the snooze button and once again fall asleep. Finally, Heather turned on the lights and I groaned. Why can't I just sleep forever? I thought to myself. I rolled out of bed and started my day. I wished I could just sleep through all of my problems. I didn't feel like dealing with people today. I was feeling very hurt by a particular friend of mine, and was wallowing in self pity. I just wanted to go back under the covers and hide from the world, but I had already made my bed. Instead, I opted for just sitting cross-legged on it (I was still trying to wake up). As I sat there, looking around my room, I spotted my old yearbook peeking out of my bookshelf.

Wanting to do something other than think about punching this person, I grabbed it. As I flipped through the picture-filled pages, I found cute little notes from friends. They weren't very deep or encouraging. I kept turning the pages, looking for something big, though I didn't know what. Not to too many pages later, I stumbled across an entire page filled with little blue words. Rachel had always been a long-winded person, and I had found part 3 of her epistle. I found a random spot in the middle and started reading.

"Your other friends will not always be there for you. They will ditch you when you need them most. Some will use you. Some with hurt you deeper than you believe is possible. Some will change and won't want to hang out with you anymore because you won't have anything else in common other than your homework. Some will talk about you behind you back, break promises, and spill your secrets. Some will even break your heart. 

"But you know, at the end of the day, when everyone else has gone, and the lights are out, Jesus is there waiting for you. You know, I started signing this before you gave your vespers talk to me in your room, so I know the big point I gave you is kind of like preaching to the choir. But maybe one day you'll forget, and you'll look back on this and remember your testimony - remember that you must rely on God instead of your friends."

Amazed, I couldn't read on. Tears filled my eyes as I realized what a powerful and loving God I was pushing myself away from. When my friends fell short, God was always there, waiting for me to put my trust in Him. But I turned away from Him, again trusting my heart to the human beings around me. God is the only one who will always be there for me. He will never let me down.

But that doesn't mean that I'm going to abandon all of my friendships. All of my friends are very near and dear to my heart. They would have to do a lot to lose me as a friend. And, to be perfectly honest, I am not even close to being a great friend to any of them. But the good news is that I have a perfect example to follow after: Jesus Christ, my Best Friend.

CLAP YOUR HANDS

The Master of the Wind

As we gathered in the inner cabin to begin sundown worship, I scrambled up into the loft, perching myself precariously on the tilted window ledge. Flashlights turned off one by one, and soon the only light came from the glow of the wood stove and the moonlight dimly streaming through the three dusty windows lining the crooked roof. I loved the way the heat vibrated from the well-stocked stove, making me feel warm and safe, but the cramped room was quickly becoming stuffy. Looking for relief from the sauna-like atmosphere, I stuck my head halfway out the window.

As I sucked in the crisp fresh air, I couldn't help but stare at the scene before me. The moon outlined the snow-covered boulder field, and the tall trees surrounding the huge rocks framed the rocky mountain further off in the distance. It was breathtakingly beautiful. But at the same time, it sent a shiver of fear down my back. The darkness was everywhere, leaving shadows for unknown things to creep around in. A chill went through me as the wind licked at my back.

 Quickly, I ducked back into the safety of the warm cabin. But compared to where I had just come from, the air was too shallow to make breathing possible. So soon I found myself back where I had been, my head just enough outside the window to be able to breathe the fresh air, but with one ear inside so that I could hear Mirjam sharing her worship thought.

This pattern of in-and-out was repeated several times. I found the outside too windy and dark, but the inside too hot and stuffy. Frustrated with myself for not being able to find a temperature balance, I abandoned all attempts at listening to the worship going on below me and stuck my whole head out into the night.

The sound of the wind whistling through the trees filled my ears, and as I listened a song came into my head.


I know the Master of the wind.
I know the Maker of the rain.
He can calm a storm, make the sun shine again.
I know the Master of the wind.


And then it hit me.

Too often I live life my way, locking myself into my little warm comfort box. But being one who doesn't like too much heat (or being in confined spaces, for that matter), I cannot stay in it long. I peek my head halfway out, longing for fresh air. But while I breathe in the wonderful air, I look around at the unknown and get scared. Fear of failure and disappointment overwhelm me. This wind whips at me and I retreat hastily back into my comfort box.

But, after tasting the fresh air outside of the box, I cannot be satisfied with the stale, shallow air inside. Soon, I find myself sneaking a small little venture out into the unknown, only to retreat once again to my safe haven. This pattern continues as I try to find the balance between the fresh air of Christ and my comfort zone. But it cannot be found.

The answer to my dilemma is in those song lyrics. Sitting there on the fence between hot and cold, the main phrase of the chorus rang in my head.

I know the Master of the wind.


 I don't have to be afraid of the unknown, for God himself shapes it. But in order to set God as the Master of my life, I have to let go of my comfort box and step out completely into the wind. It is then, and only then, that I can live my life fully for Christ.

MY SYMPHONY